PrernaLal.com

Your Janitor is Probably Smarter than You Part II

// July 18th, 2009 // Moron of the Week

Gasp! Your Janitor is probably smarter than you is back!!

Why is there a turkey walking around the parking lot of one of the buildings that we clean? The owners called Animal Control but they couldn’t help since turkey is considered ‘wildlife.’ In the meantime, the turkey continues to roam the building, poop on the front mat and make work for us. I don’t understand why someone doesn’t just take the turkey home and have an early Thanksgiving!

Janitors don’t tidy. We clean. There is a very essential difference between cleaning and tidying. If your floor is covered with piles of boxes, paper and miscellaneous items scattered around, we can clean-up what is ascertained as ‘dirt’ but cannot tidy your floor for you.

Sunflower seeds should be banned from office spaces. Banned. Banned. Banned. Actually, it should be a question on the employee qualification forms and during the interview process: Can you aim all your sunflower shells into the garbage bin or do they just end up scattered on the floor? You can’t? Next please.

Women are usually much better than men at using bathrooms (and many other things). But, please stop flushing your tampons down the toilet! There’s like four signs in the bathroom — on the door, near the mirror, on the tampon machine and even on the bathroom door as you take a poop or piss. We just had to remove the tampon machine because people can’t follow instructions.

Stop bringing your dogs to work! Half of the vacuum is filled with dog-hair and bone fragments! Actually this reminds me — stop bringing your dog to the gym, and especially not the women’s room! It’s not like you are blind and need the dog around for work or exercise!

Nothing beats how some men use their urinals. Why on earth are pee stains found 6 foot above the ground? Please do the gravity-defying target practicing with your guns in your own home. Or better yet, clean up your mess after yourself.

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!