No Borders and Binaries

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Till We Meet Again | A Bette-Tina Beginning Chapter 21

“That was OFFICIALLY the worst movie ever. Remind me never to let you pick the movies we watch together,” Bette grumbled walking out of the cinema.

“Bette! It is the highest grossing Indian movie in overseas markets to date, critically acclaimed too, and I loved it! It was so romantic, so heart-felt and tender, so… ” Tina started blissfully.

“…So very painful, annoying and gyrating on the nerves,” Bette finished with a growl. “I feel like I just sat through an expensive, unnecessarily long marriage counseling session that told me to have an affair. And goodness, the lead character, he complained about everything from the weather to his extraordinarily stunning and beautiful wife to how much his leg hurt all the fucking time and what a potty mouth. How could she want that loser over her kind, gentle and loving husband?” Bette shuddered in wonder.

Tina just raised an eyebrow at Bette.

“What? Oh please, do not look at me that way. I am not THAT bad! Fuck, it is cold and my fucking knee is killing me!” Bette pulled her coat tightly around her.

Tina stifled a giggle.

“You don’t think that love finds a way, Bette? It is such a beautiful thought.” They walked along a familiar path to the Times Square station.

“T…that overly-sentimental and misleading thought makes no sense when put to test. Love cannot find a way even when given a roadmap, with a compass pointing in the right direction. You and your partner—together—have to find a way, not love. Left on its own, love finds a way to divorce. Besides, they were having an extra-marital affair for crying out loud, one that was being GLORIFIED —how can you possibly be so blasé and justify that by saying it was romantic or had anything to do with love?! True love—yes, the fairytale kind in good books and bad movies—does not leave broken relationships in its wake.”

“Bette! They were destined to get together from the very moment they met, with or without the affair. Don’t you get it? I am not justifying the extra-marital relationship but what do you do when you are caught up in a marriage that is all wrong for you and then you meet your soul mate?”

“I know what NOT to do—go out, have an affair, and break every single relationship along the way, ending up lonely and miserable and worse off than before!” Bette snapped at her.

“Why are you being so testy and judgmental? It is a difficult question to answer and you don’t know unless and until you are in the shoes of the protagonist,” Tina reasoned.

“That is not about to happen so I am spared, thank goodness,” Bette said, shaking her head.

“Did you not have a good time?” Tina stopped walking and looked at Bette sadly, hanging her head.

“Now, when did I say that?” Bette limped back to her.

“You have only been complaining non-stop ever since we exited the cinema!”

“That doesn’t mean I had a bad time! Tina…T, I can never have a bad time with you doing anything.”

“Never?” Tina queried hopefully.

“Never…” Bette answered, nodding and pausing for effect, “say never.”

“Bette!” Tina swatted her shoulder playfully.

“Tina!” Bette scrunched up her face in mock pain.

“Uff…forget it. Did you like anything AT ALL about the movie?” They resumed walking.

“The actresses were gorgeous, so very sexy, especially the fashion magazine executive—almost worth the pain of sitting through the melodrama,” Bette replied, smiling to herself. Tina felt another round of sharp jealous pangs in her stomach and fought hard to overcome them.

“Really? I also thought the rich and handsome husband was really hot,” Tina replied, trying to get a reaction out of Bette.

“What? I guess he was not too bad,” Bette said uncertainly, swallowing the taste of her own bitter medicine.

“Everything is perfect now…” Bette fumbled for her phone as Tina’s eyebrows almost shot off her head with surprise. She had changed her ring tone from that annoying Simple Plan “Shut Up!” song to the Freezepop one they had skated to a few weeks back!

“Nothing can be perfect when you call me, Al,” Bette answered dryly. Tina put both hands on her forehead, trying to quell the rush of frustration immediately following the exhilaration.

“WHAT do you mean you are going to LA on assignment two days from now…wait that is OUR anniversary?” Bette barked into the phone taking Tina by surprise.

“No, No, you DO not get to use that as an excuse!” she continued, irritated, as Tina watched on.

“What is THAT supposed to mean Al? Of course I want to go see my sister and spend time as a family…but I have work commitments of my own,” Bette sighed in defeat, her shoulders sagging.

Tina reached out and squeezed Bette’s hand gently, trying to reassure her. Bette relaxed slightly and smiled back tightly at her.

“How long? And can you not go the next day?” she rolled her eyes at the sky.

“You know what, Al, just go. Not being with me on the night of our tenth anniversary is not going to change how things are in this marriage right? I get the logic,” she hung up, completely frustrated by the conversation with Alice as Tina rubbed her back, between her shoulder blades.

“FUCK!” She screamed and flung her cell phone with all her might. It landed in the water fountain.

“Bette!” Tina ran towards the phone, trying to see if she could salvage it.

Bette ignored her and started limping away, trying to get a hold of her anger by focusing on her pain.

“Bette! Wait…what happened?” She fell into step after trying unsuccessfully to retrieve the phone.

“Alice is going to LA on some stupid work assignment two days from today, Saturday, on OUR wedding anniversary!”

“What?! You have to stop her or go with her!” Tina exclaimed. She could not believe that Alice would stay away from Bette on their big ten. Tina could never envision doing the same.

“Oh, I don’t give a fuck anymore. Let her go—I will toast to my freedom instead,” Bette muttered under her breathe.

She stopped and turned towards Tina, “she, whom I love, I wish to be free—even from me,” Bette whispered softly.

“Bette—you cannot let that happen! So what if we failed at our first attempt, we will try again.”

“Try what again? Marriage or sex?” Bette remarked dryly.

“Bette!” Tina chuckled in protest. “You know, I have been reading a book in which the author says…”

“Enough! I don’t want to know about the ridiculous advice from those stupid pop-culture books you keep reading. We keep trying to salvage our marriages, save our relationships on a daily basis. I need a holiday from all of this—For one day, I just want to be free and do whatever my heart desires.”

“And what does your heart desire Bette?” Tina asked softly, holding her breathe as they arrived at Times Square As usual some wannabe musician was strumming his guitar and singing as they waited for their train. Tina dropped some loose change in his box as they moved past him.

“God bless you my child and may all your dreams come true,” he called after her.

My heart, just whisper in my ear
Where are you headed?
Just speak softly, so no one else will hear
What is it that you yearn for,
And what is it that you seek instead,
Don’t hide it from yourself anymore.

“Loads of things, like there is a final performance at the Met Opera tomorrow I have been meaning to check out. I don’t have tickets and probably cannot obtain one now—but I still want to check it out,” she said wistfully.

Tina fished something out of her handbag and handed it to Bette. “Do you mean this show?” she said excitedly.

Bette took the tickets and squealed out loud, “WHERE and WHEN did you get these?

Let your heart sing out loud
Desires that are unsaid, dreams that are unfulfilled,
My beloved, spell them out now

Tina giggled at her rare show of excitement. “I got them a while ago since it is put on by my former production house. I would ask Eric but he hates the opera. Will you come with me? These are for tomorrow night.”

Bette calmed down and looked at Tina uncertainly, “Are you sure? Shouldn’t you be spending time with Eric? It is also your anniversary.”

On this path of life…On this path of love
You meet someone with whom you belong
You keep questioning, you keep thinking
Whether this is the one who pined for all along

“If you can do what your heart desires, so can I. These tickets would be wasted on him, even if he decided he wanted to go. Lets get together tomorrow to plan something for both Alice and Eric on Saturday and enjoy our night out on Friday after we are done. Capiche?” Tina smiled.

Your heart has found its destination
Yet your feet hesitate to take the step
But since life is a merry-go-round
Throw caution to the winds
And overstep your bounds

“Capiche.” Bette nodded, smiling back. As always, she missed her train to spend a few more minutes with Tina, waiting until the blonde had boarded her train before boarding the next one.

Love will find a way
Every day
Love will find a way
Every way.
******************************************************************************

REPEAL H8!

PRO-MIGRANT

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This site is belongs to a post-graduate student now headed for law school. It is part of a growing network of pro-migrant voices online that seek to counter the hatred and ignorance spewed by hate groups and promote meaningful immigration reform. Beyond that, you will also find discussions about political economy, post-colonialism, neo-liberalism, subaltern studies, queer theory (and the l word) topped by an occasional rant about the order of things and educational resources now and then. Do leave comments whenever you can.

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